Heridas
by MrRizzoli
Summary: JJ's having trouble dealing with the anniversary of her sister's death and instead of resorting to old ways of coping, she comes up with a new one. Trigger Warning for talk of suicide and self harm. Rated M for that and phone sex with another female. One Shot.
1. Heridas

**Heridas**

_**I'm having a really rough night and this is a result of that. Trigger warning galore on this thing. If you're triggered by talk of suicide, depression, or self harm, I suggest you exit this story now. Also, sex. More specifically phone sex between two women.**_

I hit the send button before I even realized what the hell I was doing. It's after 3 am in London. Part of me hopes she answers but the rational part hopes like hell her phone is on silent and I don't wake her up.

I drop my phone on the coffee table; the noise it makes is amplified by the fact that my house is completely silent. It almost echoes, that's how quiet and empty my house is right now.

I grab the glass next to my phone and realize it's empty. I'm not sure when that happened but I do know it's the third time I've emptied it since I walked in the door an hour ago. The bottle next to the glass is half full and looking at it, I've come to the conclusion that before the night is over, it will be completely empty. At this point, I say screw the glass and take a gulp of the whiskey and cringe as it burns my throat.

My phone still hasn't made a noise, maybe she's really asleep. I pick it up to see if I actually sent the text or if I just wish I had.

_I need you…_

Nope, I sent it. Why did I send it? She made her choice, granted it was after I made mine, but she made it. She showed up at Rossi's, watched me marry the 'man of my dreams' (I actually hear myself scoff at the thought), and then left the next morning on a flight to London. She took Easter's offer but I don't think she took it for the reasons she said she did.

Anyway, here it is the anniversary of my sister's death, the anniversary of the day she took her own life. Of course it would be the one Thursday we're not away on a case. Henry is with his father this week and I'm home alone. I should have gone out with-

My thoughts are stopped by the ringing of my phone; I don't even bother to check the caller ID. Hoping against hope that it's a case.

"Jareau."

"Jennifer…"

God, how I've missed that voice.

"Y-you called?"

Emily chuckles lightly and it makes a small smile spread across my face, "You needed me, I'll always call when you need me. Even if it's at 3 am."

The last sentence sends a pain through me, "I'm so sorry I woke you."

"You didn't wake me, Jennifer. I was actually switching my laundry. No one uses the laundry room at this time of night so it works to my advantage."

I hear a light shuffling on the other end of the phone, followed by a small sigh. I know Emily, she's probably just climbed into a hot bath, she probably couldn't sleep and used the laundry as an excuse.

"Are you gunna talk to me or did you just want to listen to me breathe like a creep, Jareau?"

I laugh at the teasing tone in her voice, "Depends, Prentiss, you have time to talk to me or are you gunna fall asleep in that nice hot bath?"

This time it was her turn to laugh, "You know me too well. What's up, Jennifer?"

"I needed someone and you were the first, and honestly the only, person to come to mind."

"Where's Will?"

"N-no one told you?" I stuttered having taken another swig of whiskey, "I figured you were the first person Penelope called."

"Told me what? Did something happen? Is everyone ok? I can be on a flight in a couple of hours if-"

"Emily, relax. Everyone is fine. Well physically anyway," I take a deep breath before speaking again, "He left me, Em, right after the whole Askari thing."

"Jennifer that was a year ago! Why didn't you tell me?"

I shrug my shoulders, as if she can see it happen. I don't trust my voice right now.

"I can't see you shrug your shoulder, Jen. You have to actually talk. Unless you want to Skype while I'm naked in the bath."

I feel a ball of warmth in my stomach at the suggestion, "I wouldn't object."

"Jennifer…"

"I know, I know. I'm sorry it's just… Today sucks and I'm all alone."

"Shit, I should have called you today! I was so busy at work that I completely forgot what today was. And I really shouldn't have since I had to sign and date about 300 forms. Jennifer, I'm so sorry, Love."

Ugh, she had to go and call me Love. She started doing that when she moved to London; I assume it's more common than things like Baby is here. But whenever she called me Love, it made my heart flutter.

"It's ok, Emily, you have a life."

"That's no excuse. I still should have called you. I'm here now though, I know today is hard for you, talk to me, Jennifer."

She knew how hard today was for me because since the first anniversary after we met, she was the only one to see it affect me. She showed up at my house, completely unaware that it was the anniversary of Ros's death, she told me she knocked for almost 10 minutes and she knew I was home; my car was in the driveway. I've spent every year since I turned 18 the same way, drinking myself into a stupor and cutting into my own skin. The alcohol numbed me and the cutting made me feel again, it was a great combination in my screwed up mind.

When I didn't answer, she used the key she knew I kept inside the planter by the door. I vaguely remember hearing her call out, saying she tried my phone but there was no answer which worried her because I always answer her calls. I remember the sound of her combat boots on the hardwood floor of the hallway leading to my bedroom. I remember the creaking of my bedroom door. I remember knowing it was her but refusing to look at her. I definitely remember the brand new bottle of wine hitting the floor and shattering. I remember the sound of her screaming my name as she saw me sitting in the middle of my bed. I remember the various empty beer bottles littering my floor and bed. I remember the sting of the blade running across my lower abdomen while I could feel her eyes boring into me. I remember her ripping off her t-shirt and racing to the end of my bed and then climbing onto my bed and straddling my thighs. I remember her pushing my hands away and throwing the razor blade on the bedside table. I remember her once white shirt turning pink and then red as she pressed it to my stomach to stop the blood.

"You still there, Jen?"

"Mhm," Is all I can muster.

I remember that was the first time we made love. I remember her getting me in the shower. I remember her staying clothed or well at least in her jeans and bra since her shirt was ruined. She'd had a crush on me for a while, I knew it because I'd overheard her telling Penelope, and I guess she was trying to control herself or something. I remember getting out of the shower and suddenly being very sober, almost **too **sober. I remember looking in those deep brown eyes as I stood in the middle of my bedroom wrapped in nothing but a towel. I remember the amount of love they held, love that I'd never seen in her eyes for anyone else. I remember leaning forward, wrapping my hands in her shiny, wet, jet black hair, and pulling her lips to mine. I remember her being apprehensive at first but as soon I ran my tongue over her bottom lip, all inhibitions went out the window.

"What are you thinking about, Jennifer?" Her voice pulls me from my thoughts again.

"You. I miss you, Emily. I wasn't lying when I said I needed you."

"Have you done it again?" She speaks softly, almost as if she doesn't want anyone to hear us though we're both alone.

"No but I wanted to. I only got home from the office an hour ago. I knew the longer I stayed away from home, the easier it would be to avoid. But I had to come home at some point and I'm alone. Will moved across town and has a new girlfriend. Henry's with him until Sunday night. Reid has his own stuff going on after Gideon. Pen was out sick. Morgan's doing whatever Morgan does. Hotch took tomorrow off so he could spend a long weekend with Jack. And I don't know Kate well enough to make her deal with me. I wish you were here, Emily. I **need** you."

I hear a soft moan, one that I probably wasn't supposed to hear. She knows exactly what I mean now.

"Do you want me to come home, Jennifer?"

"London is your home now, Emily. I can't pull you away from that." I swallow the fact that I really wanted to scream yes.

"No, **you** are my home. Jennifer, I'm serious, I will be on the first plane I can get a ticket for. Say the word, Jennifer."

"Tell me what you'd do if you were with me right now, Emily."

I didn't even bother to go to my room; I knew no one would come knocking on my door. Instead I kick off my boots, unbutton my blouse to get more comfortable, and stretch out on the couch. I can tell by the intake of breath I heard, that Emily needs me as much as I need her.

"Emily," I almost cried out as my fingers graze over the scars on my stomach.

"Where are you?"

"The couch, I just laid down."

I hear her take another deep breath, "I wish I was there. Hovering over you as I run my hand along your side, I know how much it relaxes you."

She's right, most people like having their hair played with or their back rubbed, I'd rather someone, more specifically Emily, run their hand and fingers up and down my ribcage. I put the phone on speaker and lay it on my chest as the hand that was running along my scars travels up my side, just like Emily would do.

"I'd start at your hip," She knows well enough that I'm probably doing everything she says she would, picturing her as I go. "Slowly, my fingers would creep all the way up, pausing for just a second on each rib."

I hear another moan, I wonder if she's doing the same thing to herself imagining it's my body she's touching.

"When my fingers make it to your bra, I'd reach up and pull the strap down your arm a bit. Then, I'd slowly walk my fingers the length of your collar bone, down the middle of your chest, and into the valley of your breasts, before pulling your bra down."

"Emily," It's more of a moan this time as I expose my own breasts to the cool air of my living room and my nipples begin to harden almost instantly.

"Then I'd lean forward and follow the same path my fingers just took; only this time, I'd use my lips and tongue. When I finally get to your breasts, I'd take your nipple into my mouth while my fingers worked the other one."

My hips buck involuntarily at the thought of Emily's mouth on me again after all these years. I swear her touch is burned into my skin.

"I'd spend a few minutes on one breast before I switched to the other. My right hand would slowly make its way from your hip, across your belly, stopping to feel the scars that brought us together. I hate that you had to do that but they're a part of you and I love every single part of you, Jennifer."

There's a pause on both our parts, I'm fighting off tears as I hear her breathing begin to speed up.

"Emily, please." I'm begging and I don't even care how it makes me sound.

"I'd unbutton your pants and slowly drag the zipper down." She pauses again to take a deep breath, "I'd take my mouth of your breast as I look you in the eye while my hands work your pants and panties over your hips and down your legs."

I stare at the ceiling and concentrate as hard as possible, conjuring a picture of her in my mind as I pull my pants and underwear from my body before kicking them to the floor.

"Then I'd trail kisses all the way from your ankles, up your soft, smooth calves, over the scar on your left knee from that soccer accident, up your strong thighs. I'd kiss each hip while I spread your legs enough for me to fit between them. I'd look up into your eyes one last time before I lowered myself between your legs. I'd spread you open with my thumbs before licking you from your entrance up to your clit."

We've never done this before, phone sex, but I swear it's like she's right here with me.

"I want to feel your hands in my hair, Jennifer. Scratching my scalp and pulling my hair to bring me closer. When you do, I'd give you one more lick before settling on your clit. I'd wrap my lips around it and suck while flicking it lightly with my tongue."

I breathe in deeply, "Fuck, Emily."

"What do you want me to do next, Jennifer?"

"Fuck me. Please, God, fuck me, Emily."

I can almost hear the smirk in her voice, "Do you want my fingers in your pussy, Jennifer?"

"So bad," I moaned out although I'm not completely sure if I actually got the words out or if it was just a moan.

"You want me to slowly enter you with two fingers?"

This time I don't bother trying to form words, I only moan.

"Do it, Jennifer. Slowly push two fingers into that tight pussy."

Another moan falls from my lips.

She moans, too, "God, I remember how amazing your pussy felt with my fingers in it. Do you remember, Baby?"

"Fuck yes." I moan as I continue to slowly thrust my fingers in and out of myself. "Harder, please."

"I'd pull my fingers out all the way, flatten my tongue and lick you again. When my tongue hit your clit, I'd slam three fingers into you."

"Fuck!" The scream rips from my throat as I roughly enter myself with three fingers, just like Emily would.

"That's it, Jennifer. I'd fuck you nice and hard. I know you love it hard. I can hear how wet you are, Baby. It's so fucking hot."

"E-Emily…"

"Is the phone on speaker?" I mumble my response that it is, "Use your other hand and rub your clit, Baby. Rub it nice and hard while you fuck yourself and imagine it's me."

I'm so close to orgasm that I feel like my body is on fire. The fact that she has this much of an affect over me is ridiculous but I love it.

"Are you gunna cum for me, Jennifer?"

"Y-yes! Fuck me, Emily. Make me cum and scream your name."

"I'd slam my fingers in you and as I pulled them back, I'd curl them and hit that stop, the one that makes you see stars."

I do exactly what she says and much like she said, I begin to see stars dancing before my eyes as my fingers hit my g-spot every time I pull back.

"So f-fuckin' cl- God! Close, Emily."

"Cum for me, Jennifer, cum all over my hand."

That was it, I pulled back one more time and hooked my fingers and I felt my entire body explode with pleasure. I screamed something that sounded vaguely like Emily's name and I could hear her moaning mine.

After what felt like hours, my breathing calmed down enough that I could move again. I brought my hand to my mouth and licked it clean of my own cum. I moaned at the taste.

"Did you just lick your fingers clean?"

"Mhm," I mumbled as my fingers were still in my mouth.

"Christ. That's enough to make me want to cum again." Emily takes a deep breath, "Call out sick tomorrow, I'll be home by 10."

"I love you, Emily."

"I love you, too, Jennifer."

And with that, I fell asleep on the couch, naked from the waist down, my blouse hanging open, bra pulled down under my breasts, and the sounds of Emily breathing over the phone. For the first time since I turned 18, I was able to cope without the help of a razor blade. Thank God for Emily Prentiss.


	2. Sanado

**Sanado**

I climbed out of the tub so fast that I actually tripped. I just barely managed to catch myself on the edge of the sink before my face met the floor. That would have been fun to explain to Jennifer.

Running into my bedroom, not even bothering with a towel, I opened up my laptop that sat on my dresser and searched for a ticket on the next plane headed for DC. It took me only a few minutes to find a plane leaving at 6:15 local time. That gave me a little over an hour to get packed and out the door so I could get the airport with enough time to check in. Now the question is do I pay the ridiculous $8,000 for first class or the slightly less ridiculous $2,000 for a regular seat? I ponder the question for only a moment before I realize I've yet to sleep and I probably won't get any sleep in coach. First class it is.

After booking the ticket, I race around my apartment grabbing essentials like my phone, computer, chargers, and wallet. I don't even bother packing any clothes because that will take too damn long, I throw on a pair of baggy sweatpants, tank top, and my Yale sweatshirt before slipping on a pair of sneakers and running to my car. As I pull out of the parking garage, I dial Clyde's number praying that he's awake.

"Come on, Easter, answer the phone you British bastard."

I try his number three more times to no avail. I don't want to leave a message though, that'd just be rude. I stop at a red light and dial his office number. Maybe he fell asleep there.

"Easter."

He sounds half asleep and I laugh, "Fall asleep at the desk again?"

"Emily, it's damn near 4 in the morning," He groans and I hear him crack his neck, "Why in the bloody hell are you calling me right now?"

"I quit, Clyde." No use beating around the bush, right?

"I'm sorry, Love, could you repeat that? I'm pretty sure I just hear you say the words 'I quit'."

I laugh again, he's gunna hate me, "You heard correct. I'm sorry but it's Jennifer. She-"

Clyde cuts me off, "Did she get herself kidnapped again? You don't have to quit, you know I'll give you the time off to go do your knight in shining armor thing."

"No, Clyde, she didn't get herself kidnapped. I should have never left her in the first place," I answer as I step on the gas, hearing a honk behind me. "I'm in love with her, Clyde. I should have never let her marry Will and I should have never taken this position at Interpol."

"Why are you calling me at 4 AM to tell me this, Prentiss?"

"I'm in the car," I pause hoping he'll understand where I'm going with this. "I'm driving to the airport now. She needs me Clyde and I need her."

I hear Clyde take a deep breath and let it out, "Well, I'm going to miss the hell out of you but I'll be damned if me and this job are the reason you leave that woman for a third time. You'll always have a place in my team, Emily. Good luck."

"Thank you, Clyde." I fight tears back before I speak again, "Goodbye."

I'm pretty much on autopilot the rest of the way to the airport. I park my car and realize I can't just leave it here forever so I shoot Clyde a quick email telling him where the car is, the keys are in it, and to do whatever he wants with it before I grab my bag and run for the airport entrance. I'm just so damn ready to get on that plane and get home to Jennifer. It's been too damn long.

I'd almost fallen asleep in the lounge when I hear the call that I can board my plane. And once I'm in my seat, phone off, and seat belt buckled, I really do fall asleep. It's not until we hit a small patch of turbulence that I wake up and check my watch that I realize I've been asleep for almost the entire flight. We're scheduled to touch down in DC at about 9:30 local time, I'd changed my watch back to DC time before boarding the plane and see that it's 8:20.

"Cutting it kinda close," I laugh to myself as I remember that I told Jennifer I'd be there by 10.

I pull out my laptop and turn it on. I can use this last hour on the plane to finish up the case file I'd been working on; I can't be the asshole the quits last minute **and** leaves unfinished work. As it powers up, I find myself not opening my folder of case files but my pictures. I ended up in a folder that was photos of just JJ and myself. I'd wanted to delete them after she married Will, just to keep myself from looking at them and getting all sad and whatnot, but I never got around to it.

"Miss?"

I turned my head to see a flight attendant holding out a packet of tissues, I hadn't even realized I was crying.

"Are you ok?" The red head smiled warmly, "Do you need a drink or something?"

I shook my head, "No, thank you. I wasn't aware I was crying. Just excited to finally be going home."

"Well I'm sure she'll be happy to see you." The flight attendant smiled again gesturing to my computer, "We'll be landing in about an hour, will she be waiting for you?"

"I'm hoping she'll be at home sleeping," I laughed and shook my head, "But knowing Jennifer, she'll have been waiting for any flight coming from London. This was very last minute and I didn't tell her exactly what plane I'd be coming in on."

"Well, for your sake, I hope she's there. You look like you could use a hug."

I smile my thanks for the tissues as she walks away and look back at the computer. The photo currently taking up my screen was taken the night we first made love, the night I found out just how hard she takes her sister's death, and still does to this day. In the photo, Jennifer lay naked, half on top of me. She has a black sheet draped over her hips covering the cuts and scars and down to her knees, my left arm is wrapped around her chest keeping her breasts out of view for the picture I knew I was taking. Jennifer had no idea I had my phone in my hand because her face was turned into my neck, kissing and nipping at the skin over my pulse point, the smile on my face is one of the most genuine I've ever had grace my usually stone like features. I'm still not sure if she knows this picture even exists but it sparked the memory of the day and night to come flooding back to me.

"_Answer your phone, Jennifer."_

_I hang up the phone for the fourth time and third message in less than ten minutes and throw it on the passenger seat. This isn't like her; she always answers my calls, even when she's mad at me. Luckily, I'm only five minutes from her house. Maybe she's taking a shower or fell asleep. _

_As I finally pull up to her house, I see her car in the drive way, "Well, at least I know she's home."_

_I grab my phone and dial her number one more time as I exit the car. Still no answer. I open the back door of my car to grab the bottle of wine I'd brought with me. The last case was hell and if I know Jennifer like I think I do, she could use a few glasses._

_I reach the door and knock a few times and wait for an answer. Nothing. _

"_Why are you avoiding me, Jennifer?" I ask out loud though I'm talking to myself._

_After knocking again and still getting no answer, I fish the spare key out of the flower pot and open the door. It's eerily quiet in her house. She almost always has some sort of noise going on in here whether it's the TV, the stereo, or her banging stuff around as she re-arranges yet another room simply because she has nothing better to do. _

"_Jennifer, where are you?" I yell into the house, "I've been calling for like ten minutes and knocked a few times."_

_I heard a shuffling noise coming from the back of the house and look down the hallway. Her bedroom door is closed, maybe she really is sleeping. It would definitely explain the lack of noise._

_I quietly make my way down the hall, not wanting to wake her up in case she is sleeping. Once I reached the door, I opened it while calling her name; I heard a whimper as I looked up at the bed. _

"_Jennifer!" I yelled her name and dropped the bottle of wine, letting it shatter._

_Jennifer was in the middle of her bed, surrounded by more beer bottles than I cared to count, bleeding. It wasn't until I saw the razor blade that she was dragging across her own skin, that I knew what the blood was from._

"_Jen, what the fuck?" _

_I ripped my white t-shirt over my head and practically jumped on the bed and straddled her thighs. There's blood all over her stomach and the waist of her shorts. I grab the razor blade and throw it on her end table with one hand as I try to stop the bleeding with my shirt._

"_Jennifer, talk to me. What's going on?"_

_She doesn't say anything, she just starts crying. I pull her toward me and into a hug. It's now that I realize we're both shirtless and I have to stop the gasp that threatens to escape my throat as I feel her skin against mine. I tell myself this is no time to admit I'm in love with her. She was just sitting here, cutting into her own skin and I'm not even sure why._

_It took a few minutes to get her calmed down but once I did, I walked her to the bathroom and sat her on the toilet lid while I started the shower._

"_Listen, I don't know what's up and we don't have to talk about it, I won't push you, but I'm gunna get you in the shower and cleaned up. Ok?"_

_She gave me a non-committal shrug of her shoulders so I just continued getting the shower ready. After checking the temperature, I turned to see she'd already started getting undressed and once again, I had to keep myself from making any noise. _

_She finishes getting undressed and I gently grab her hand and lead her into the shower. I turn to gather her clothes and my shirt, hoping to get them into water and soap before the blood stains them. Just as I'm about to walk past the shower and out the door, I feel a wet hand on my shoulder._

"_Please," she sniffles, "D-don't leave me, Em."_

_There is no way I can walk away from that pained voice so I didn't leave. I pulled off my boots and socks and got in the shower, leaving on my jeans and bra, luckily my go-bag is in my trunk._

"_I miss her," JJ kind of squeaks out._

"_Miss who, Jen?"_

"_My s-sister; today is the an-anniversary of the day she committed suicide."_

_I say nothing as I wrap my arms around her and pull her head into the crook of my neck. I can feel her begin to sob again, her body jumping with each inhale, "I'm so sorry, Jennifer. I had no idea. I would have been here sooner. I'm so sorry."_

_I let her cry in my arms while attempting to keep her under the spray of the shower to keep her warm. I manage to get her standing on her own two feet so I can look her in the eye when I speak to her._

"_Hun, we gotta get these cuts cleaned up a little, ok?" She nods as I grab a wash cloth hanging from the curtain rod and soak it with warm water, "D-do you need me to do this or…"_

_She drops her head as she takes the wash cloth, "I got it. You can go if you wanna."_

_I place a finger under her chin and look her in the eye again, "I'm not leaving you here, Jennifer. Even if you __**wanted**__ to be left alone, you'd probably have to call the cops to get me outta here and away from you. But, I am gunna get outta the shower and run to my car for my go-bag. Is that ok?"_

_I see the faintest of smiles on her lips before she nods._

"_You just be careful washing those," I nod my head, not willing to actually look at her naked body; this isn't the time for that. "I'll be back before you know it."_

_I dried off enough to throw on one of Jennifer's sweatshirts and walk to my car. When I made it back inside, she was standing in her room, wrapped in a towel, playing with the necklace she wore._

"_Hey," I whisper so I don't scare her._

"_Rosaline gave this to me the day she killed herself," she took a deep breath before speaking again, "I was only 11 but I feel like I should have told my mom. Told her that Ros gave me the necklace, maybe she would have figured it out. Anyway, I just… Today's always been hard for me but it's actually gotten harder as I've gotten older. Since I could really understand what happened, ya know?"_

_I nod, "I know. Can I ask h-how long you've been doing this?"_

_She looks down at her stomach covered by the towel, "It started when I turned 18. I'd had a rough year in high school. Everyone knew Ros killed herself when she was 17, right before she graduated, and they all got really concerned that I was gunna fly off the deep end. All the pressure and constant 'we're here for you, Jennifer' got to me and I finally did fly off the deep end. Obviously not as bad as she did but every year, since I turned 18, I get shitfaced and do this."_

_We were both silent for what seemed like hours. It wasn't until I'd realized she was still naked and I was wearing wet pants and one of her sweatshirt that I finally spoke up._

"_I-I'll let you get dressed." I hate that I stutter a bit when I'm nervous._

"_Emily, stay, please?"_

_I looked into her eyes, they were much darker than I'd ever seen them before, "Jennifer, you're standing here naked and wet, I'm sure you're cold. I'll just go wait in the living room."_

_For the second time today, as I turned to leave, I felt Jennifer's hand on my body and I stopped._

"_I need you, Emily. I'm so sick of being numb and I just need to feel. That's why I do this. I need to fucking feel and whenever I'm around you, I feel. I need you." Her voice dropped to a whisper but her eyes held mine, "Please, Emily, I need you."_

"_I'm here, Jennifer. Tell me what I can do; how can I make you feel?" _

_Jennifer took the half step that brought her just inches from me, and smiled, "I __**need**__ you, Emily."_

"_Jennifer, you're sad and upset, not to mention, you've been drinking. I don't want to take advantage of you."_

"_Look me in the eye, Emily, and tell me what you see."_

_I do as she asks; I look her deep in the eye. I see sadness and depression but I see something else, as well._

"_I've told you that I need you but I know you see it, Em. You can see that I want you just as much as I need you." She reaches one hand to my face and I lean into the feeling._

_Before I can fully react to the situation, her hands are in my hair, still dripping wet onto the borrowed sweatshirt, and her lips are on mine. It takes me another moment to react to her lips on mine but when I do react, it's intense. _

_I've had these crazy feelings for Jennifer that I could never really get out of my head no matter how hard I tried and now here I am; kissing the woman of my dreams._

"_Jennifer, are you sure about this?" I ask as I pull away from her lips, "I need you to be sure and I need you to know that I don't think I can do this if it's just a fling."_

_She doesn't answer, at least not verbally. Instead, she gives me a small smile; I almost missed it, and drops the towel and pulls me in for another kiss. I slowly walk her backwards toward her bed. She stops as she feels the plush comforter brush against her legs and reaches for the bottom of the University of Pittsburgh sweatshirt I wear. I pull away from her lips so she can rid me of the sweatshirt, just as it clears my head, I reach behind my back to undo my bra as she opens the button fly of my jeans._

"_Jennifer, I really need to hear you say you're sure about this." _

_She leans forward and places a light kiss on my lips before pulling away, "I don't think I've been more sure of anything in my entire life, Emily."_

_I lean forward, causing her to fall back onto the bed with a soft thud and moan as the cool sheets touch her warm skin. She scoots up the bed, laying her head on one of the pillows and I follow, hovering above her slightly. _

_I wish I could just lie on top of her, feel her body forming with mine, filling in the dips of my body with the curves of her own, but I remember the fresh cuts just below her belly button. I settle myself on her thighs, knees on either side of legs, and look down at her completely uncovered body. I let out a small breath as I take in the beauty of the women below me. _

"_Em?"_

_Her soft voice breaks me from my thoughts, "Jennifer, you're gorgeous. Actually, that's not even a good enough word but it's all I can come up with right now."_

_She shakes her head slightly and blushes, "I'm really not. I have open wounds on top scars on top of scars."_

_I lean forward, lightly brushing the fingers of my left hand on her right hip as my right hand travels to cup her cheek, "These cuts and scars do __**not**__ take away from your beauty, Jennifer. Without them, you wouldn't be you. They tell a story, it's a tragic story, but it's a beautiful story of a beautiful woman struggling. And yet, she still comes out on top."_

"_Actually, I'm on the bottom, right now."_

_How she managed to get that sentence out with a completely straight face is far beyond me because I immediately let out a loud laugh and fall to the side to avoid landing on top of her. She joins me in laughter for a moment before I feel the soft skin of her inner thighs on me and she's now straddling me._

"_Well now you're on top and I must say, the view is just as amazing."_

_She leans down and captures my lips with her own. I react almost instantly, running my tongue along her bottom lip. Jennifer slowly opens her mouth and allows my tongue entrance and I'm so lost in the feeling of her tongue against mine that I don't even register my wrist being grabbed or my arm moving until I feel my finger tips come in contact with the wet warmth between Jennifer's legs and we both moan into the kiss at the feeling._

_She holds my wrist in place for a moment, both of us lost in the kiss. After what feels like an eternity of just kissing her, I feel her pull on my wrist, moving it further south before she lets go of my wrist. I run my fingers slowly up and down through the wetness. _

"_Emily," Jennifer whispers in my ear, I can hear the want in her voice._

_I make a move to flip her but she pushes her weight into me, not allowing me to move._

"_Please, I really don't want you to have to look down at me," She won't meet my eyes. "Just let me stay here. Please?"_

_I nod slightly; I'll always honor her wishes, especially if it makes her feel better about herself. I give her a light push on her hip, getting her to settle on my right thigh, my right hand still between her legs. I slowly enter her with one finger, not wanting to hurt or rush the beautiful woman above me._

_Jennifer moans and I swear I can feel it reverberate through me. She begins rolling her hips against me as I bend my knee, giving both her and myself more leverage, I can feel her clit rubbing against my palm. After a few minutes, her hips begin to move faster, my name and other mumbled words fall from her lips rapidly. I know she's close so I add another finger causing a loud moan to fill the room._

"_It's ok, Jennifer, I have you." I tilt my head up and kiss just below her chin, "Let go, baby."_

_The movement of her hips starts to become jerky as I hook my fingers, pushing on her g-spot._

"_Em-Emily," it came out as a strangled moan and I feel a rush of fluid coat my fingers and she collapses on top of me._

"_Are you ok?" I ask as I nuzzle my nose into her hair._

_She kisses my neck once before rolling to the side and laying her back half on me, "Yes. Better than I have in a while."_

_She turns her head, face in my neck; I discreetly grab my phone as I wrap an arm around her breasts, and snap the picture. She never saw the flash; her head was too far buried in my neck._

"Miss?"

Once again, I'm jerked from my thoughts by the flight attendant, I look at her and smile.

"I just wanted to let you know, we're gettin' ready to land. I noticed you looked a little lost in your own world and figured you missed the announcement."

"Thank you," I smile again and turn off my computer.

Once the plane finally lands and we're allowed off, I grab my carry-on and make my way off the plane. Part of me hopes Jennifer will be standing there waiting but I'm fairly certain she was drinking last night before we spoke so I also hope she's home sleeping it off.

***E&amp;J***

I woke up around four AM, still on the couch, I pulled the blanket off the back of the couch to cover myself, I didn't have the energy to walk to my room. When I woke up again, it was half past nine. Emily had said she'd be here by ten. I know there's no way I could possibly get up, shower, get dressed and make it to the airport on time so I decide to just wait at home.

Just as I step into my bathroom, I hear my phone. I let it keep ringing; I really need to wash away the tension of yesterday. I strip out of yesterday's clothes and reach to start the shower when my phone rings again. I decided t slip on my robe and answer, it must be important if they keep calling back.

"Jareau," I answer as professionally as possible.

"Jayje, are you ok?" Garcia's voice filters in through the phone, "You never take days off unless Henry is sick and I know he's with Will."

"I'm ok, Pen. I had a few drinks when I got home last night and didn't sleep well."

"I'm sorry, sweetie. I know yesterday had to be a hell of a day for you. You could have called me."

"You're sick. I wasn't gunna dump my emotional crap on you." I take a deep breath, debating if I should let Penelope know about Emily, "I had someone to talk to. A good friend, actually."

I hear a small giggle, "Would this 'good friend' happen to be a former agent with shoulder length black hair, dark, sexy features, who just texted me asking for your new address because she forgot you moved?"

I let out a laugh, "Yes, it would be."

"Good. I'm happy for you, JJ. Other than having Henry, I don't think I ever saw you as happy as when you were with Emily. Why you guys ever broke up is beyond me."

"There was a lot to it, Pen. We didn't want to let it get in the way of work. Every time one of us walked into a dangerous situation, it took everything to remember that it was our job. We couldn't risk losing our job or each other. At least we could remain friends."

"Yeah well, this is your second chance. Take it, Jay. We all know how happy you are when she's around." I her someone in the background of the conversation that sounds strangely like Derek Morgan before Penelope starts talkin' again, "Well, I'll let you go. I assume she's gunna be knockin' on your door soon. And don't worry; the secret is safe with me."

"Tell Derek I said hi."

"Derek, JJ says-" Penelope cuts herself off, "Derek's not here, what are you talkin' about? I um… it was the TV."

"Bye, Pen." I laugh as I hang up the phone and check the time, "9:45, guess it'll have to be a quick shower."

When I finally emerge from the shower, I feel much more awake and decidedly better than I did yesterday. I wrap myself in a fluffy towel and walk down the hall to my bedroom. The door's closed but I could have sworn I left if open. Then again, I don't remember if I actually left it open last night because I haven't been in there since I got home. When I open the door, I can feel her eyes on me. I look up and see that beautiful smile and those dark brown eyes.

"I see you found my hidden key," I chuckle softly.

"I'm home, baby."

Those three words, well really just the word 'home' turn my world upside down. Much like the first night all those years ago, I simply drop my towel and pull her into me for a searing kiss.

"You're home."

**So, as you can see, I decided to write a second chapter to this. I really hope it's as good as the first chapter. I'm sorry it took so long to get out but stuff like this I tend to only write when I'm having issues with myself and my depression. Also, if anyone is wondering, the first chapter "Heridas" means wounds, this chapter "Sanado" means healed. I thought it was rather fitting. Anyway, I hope you enjoy.**


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